In the season of gratitude.

For my first official post, I thought I would begin with something I have a personal connection to and it's personal for several reasons. First, I know the family in question and have known them for half of my life. Second, I'm a parent.

When I found out I was pregnant with my oldest son, it was not planned. My husband and I were shaken with shock and an overwhelming fear of failing the child we didn't even have yet. We were terrified that we weren't ready and had no idea what our life would be. I went through a troublesome pregnancy, fraught with hyperemesis gravidarum (severe morning sickness), gestational diabetes, hospitalizations, endless amounts of bloodwork, and finally an emergency c-section after 14 hours of labor due to what we discovered was preeclampsia. At the end of it all, we were given a beautiful and perfectly healthy baby boy - and we fell in love. It wasn't an overpowering surge of motherly bond, but a simple and matter of fact event where I finally met the child who I already knew so well. We'd already been through so much together that nothing else needed to be done. My first words to him were, "Hi, Buddy." Since then, I've learned that none of us are perfect parents and that there is no way to be prepared for a child nor is there a perfect time to have that child. It's always hard, it's always exhausting, and it's always truly awesome. This is not the simple, casual kind of awesome - parenthood is the formidable, breathtaking, awe-inspiring kind of awesome.

 

So let's start here: in August of this year, the U.S. Department of Agriculture reported that it will cost an average of $241,080 for a middle income family to raise a child for 18 years (you can read about it here). That doesn't include the cost of college, nor does it cover the fact that often now kids don't move out until their early 20's due to the economy, job market, and student debt. Now imagine if, each of us, upon deciding that the expense, the stress, and the responsibility of becoming a parent was worthwhile - had to sign up on a waiting list to go through a rigorous approval process where an outsider will deem whether you're prepared and fit to become a parent. Imagine that once all that was over with and you were finally given approval, you then had to pay an additional $50,000 up front to be able to have your child. All so that you could realize what many believe as an inherent right in life as well as one of the greatest joys in life.

That's what couples go through every single day when they have to tread through the waters of adoption. My friends, Adam & Megan Martignago have worked, struggled, and endured for almost five years to have and adopt their first child and become parents. Over the course of about three long years battling with many miscarriages, tears, and infertility issues, Adam and Megan chose to begin the adoption process so that they could become parents. On April 24th of this year - after many false hopes and prayers answered, "Wait," - they met their son, Luke Roper. He is beautiful, he is adorable, and he made them a family. With every passing day, Luke steals a little more of Megan and Adam's hearts, however, they still struggle to pay the adoption costs so that Luke can finally be fully and legally their child. There is a mountain of debt looming before them, and along with those costs, they are still working to afford the cost of living and raising an infant son. It's a hard balance to strike when you're working so hard to pay your bills but at the same time don't want to work too hard or you might miss out on the beauty that is your child's one and only first year.

 Adam, Megan, & Luke

I write this all because I believe that at this time of year more than any other, we become aware of our responsibility to help others. We become aware of the gift that is family. In this season of gratitude, humility, and love - won't you please join me in helping this family who so deserves to be unburdened from this weight. Amidst all of the joy, wonder, and sublime bliss of spending time with your own family this holiday season - share some of that with another family in need; a family who wishes, more than anything, to become whole.

You can donate to Adam & Megan's GoFundMe site here. You can also share this story with your own friends and family by clicking the share buttons at the bottom of the post. Over the coming weeks and months, I'll continue to post about the Martignago family and share with you how they're doing and the progress that is being made on their journey to finalizing their adoption of Luke Roper.

If you would like more information about the Martignago family here are links to their various websites which you can follow too:

The Operation Eventually Facebook Page
The Martignago Family Blog
The Martignago Family Adoption Fund

Thanks for your help, and have a wonderful holiday!